How to Cut Down Your Shopping Addiction

Understanding Shopping Addiction

Recognize the problem. As with most addictions, recognizing your behavior and coming to see it as a true impediment on your daily life and relationships is half the battle. Consult this list of symptoms, and use it to gauge the severity of your shopping addiction. This is an important way to decide exactly how much you need to cut down—whether you can be trusted to simply moderate your shopping or if it may be a better idea to simply stop shopping altogether. Shopping or spending money when you feel upset, angry, lonely, or anxious Having arguments with others about your shopping that rationalizes your behavior Feeling lost or lonely without your credit cards Consistently purchasing with credit rather than cash Feeling a euphoric rush or deep sense of ecstasy when making purchases Feeling guilt, shame, or embarrassment upon excessive spending Lying about your spending habits or the cost of specific items Having obsessive thoughts about money Spending lots of your time trying to manage money and bills to accommodate your spending habits

Look honestly at your buying habits. Keep a record of what you buy for two weeks to a month, also making note of how you pay for your purchases. Ask yourself the following questions to get a better handle on when and how you buy. Also, tracking the exact amount of money you spend for this length of time will help open your eyes to how severe your shopping habit really is.

Identify your brand of shopaholism. According to Shopaholics Anonymous, compulsive shopping can take many forms. Knowing these forms will help you understand your addiction better so that you can better understand how to help yourself. You may be able to recognize yourself on this list, or use your record of buying habits to see where you fit. Shoppers who are triggered to shop upon emotional distress Trophy shopaholics who are constantly on the hunt for the perfect item Shoppers who enjoy flashy items and love feeling like a big spender Bargain seekers who buy things only because they are on sale "Bulimic" shoppers who get are caught up in a continuous cycle of buying items, only to return them later and start buying anew Collectors who seek a feeling of completion from buying each piece of a set or the same item in every variation (color, style, etc.)

Learn the long-term effects of shopping addiction. While the short-term effects of shopping addiction may be positive, like feeling happy after completing a shopping trip, many of the long-term effects are overwhelmingly negative. Understanding these effects is a good way to face the realities of an excessive shopping habit. Spending over budget and deep financial trouble Compulsive buying over and above necessities (e.g. going to buy one sweater and leaving the store with ten) Secrecy and hiding the problem to avoid criticism Feelings of helplessness due to ongoing cycles of purchasing where guilt causes returns which then cause more purchases Impaired relationships from secrecy, lying about debt, and physical isolation as the preoccupation with shopping increases

Recognize that over-spending often has emotional causes. For many, shopping is a way to curb and escape from negative emotions. Like most addictions that provide a "quick fix" to problems with deep psychological roots, shopping can help you feel complete and capable of maintaining a false image of happiness and security. Push yourself to consider whether or not shopping is an attempt to fill a void in your life that could be otherwise solved by healthier and more sustainable lifestyles.

Making Behavioral Changes to Cut Down Shopping

Learn your triggers. A trigger is anything that makes you want to shop. Keep a journal with you for at least a week, and whenever you feel the urge to shop, write down whatever you feel brought the idea into your mind. It may be a particular environment, friend, advertisement, or feeling (like anger, shame, or boredom). Knowing your triggers is extremely helpful because you can avoid the things that make you want to shop as you are learning to decrease your habit. For example, you might go into a buying frenzy whenever you have a formal event to go to. You might get tempted to buy all sorts of wardrobe changes, designer makeup, or other products that will increase your confidence and make you feel ready for the event. Knowing this, you could make a special plan for handling invitations to big events. You might cut out event-related shopping altogether and spend a mandatory hour looking through your closet for something suitable to wear that you already own.

Cut down on shopping. The best way to limit your shopping without stopping entirely is to be more conscious of how much your budget realistically allows you to spend over and above basic essentials. Keep a close eye to your finances, and take yourself shopping only when your budget for the month (or even for the week) permits it. This way you can keep shopping occasionally, but stand to avoid some of the larger financial issues that can come with the habit. When shopping, carry as much money with you as you know you can get away with spending. Leave your credit cards at home to avoid temptation to go over your limit. You can also try making an inventory of the things you own and a wishlist of the extras that you really want. Looking at your list will help keep you grounded and able to recognize when you're about to purchase something you already have a lot of or something you don't want as badly as other items that you'll surely be tempted to purchase. Wait at least 20 minutes before making a purchase. Don't be sure that you must buy something; instead, spend time thinking about why you should or shouldn't go through with it. If you know there are particular stores where you tend to spend too much, only go to these stores on special occasions or with friends who can help monitor your purchasing. If this is a website, make sure it isn't on your list of bookmarked pages.

Go "cold turkey" with discretionary spending. Alternately, if your shopping addiction is serious, limit yourself only to the bare essentials. Be very vigilant when you must shop, and make a shopping list that you stick to. Avoid the temptation of sales and inexpensive items at discount warehouses, and allocate only a certain amount of cash to spend if you do visit one. The more specific your rules, the better. For example, instead of deciding to only shop for groceries and self-care necessities, make a complete list of self-care necessities (like toothpaste, deodorant, etc.) and do not buy anything other than what you’ve written down. Change your payment methods, and destroy and cancel all credit cards. If you feel you should have one for emergencies only, ask a loved one guard it for you. This is important since people tend to spend twice as much as they would when making purchases with a card rather than cash. Do your market research before leaving the house. Because getting carried away while browsing often brings about unneeded purchases, know exactly which brands and types of each item on your list you need to buy. This will take the fun out of shopping by cutting off the need to browse. Give up all loyalty cards that you do not use for the bare necessities that frequently appear on your shopping list.

Avoid shopping alone. Most compulsive shoppers do their purchasing alone, and if you are with others you are much more likely not to spend excessively. This is the advantage of peer pressure; let yourself learn from the moderate buying habits of people whose judgment you trust. It may even be necessary to put someone you trust in charge of your finances completely.

Get involved in other activities. Find more meaningful ways to spend your time. When trying to change compulsive behavior, it is crucial that you replace the behavior with another way of spending your time that is fulfilling and satisfying (but this time in a way that is sustainable). People find happiness in activities that make them feel so immersed that they lose track of time completely. Learn a new skill, finish a project you've put aside for a long time, or improve yourself in some other way. Whether you're reading, jogging, cooking or playing a musical instrument doesn't matter as long as you're fully engaged. While exercising and taking walks can provide a continuous source of happiness, these activities are especially useful alternatives to pursue while in the throes of a shopping urge.

Track your progress. Remember to give yourself lots of acknowledgment and encouragement while you are in the midst of changing your shopping habits. It is important to give yourself credit for your progress, as kicking an addiction is exceedingly difficult. An objective look at how far you’ve come will stop you from beating yourself up over moments of struggle and self-doubt, which are inevitable. Try monitoring the amount of money you spend in a spreadsheet. Look at the amount of trips you make to the store (or your favorite shopping sites) by making tick marks on your calendar.

Make a list of environments to avoid. Create "no-fly zones" --places that you know will trigger you to shop. In all likelihood, these are places like malls, certain stores, or large open shopping areas. Your rules should be clear and precise to avoid being able to convince yourself that you can go and just browse a little bit. List these places and steer clear from them entirely for as long as you can manage, until the urge to buy excessively dissipates significantly. Check your trigger list to make sure that you're avoiding the right places and situations while you're in the sensitive moments of "detox" from your shopping addiction. You may not have to avoid all of these environments in the long-run, and indeed this may be a very difficult task due to the omnipresence of advertisements and buying opportunities. Especially if you are only trying to cut down and not quit shopping altogether, you may simply want to limit your presence in these environments. Create a schedule of when you will allow yourself to visit your favorite stores and stick to it.

Stay local. At least when you are beginning to cut back, take a break from traveling. This can help you avoid the temptation to buy that can be brought on by new or unfamiliar places. People tend to purchase more when they shop outside of their communities. Consider that "remote buying" from shopping channels and online sources can bring the same feel of a new environment--presenting another temptation to resist.

Manage your mail. Make sure your snail mail is covered, as well as your email. Unsubscribe from the promotional emails and catalogues that your favorite stores tend to send you. Prevent the possibility of receiving unwanted offers for new credit cards by signing up for Opt-Out Prescreen. Upon providing your information here, you will not be targeted for advertising of this nature.

Set parental controls. Because the Internet is one of the most popular ways to shop now, remember that your computer environment needs to be just as "sober" as your world offline. Avoid e-commerce sites by setting blocks on your favorite online shopping sites. Download a good ad blocker program that will prevent personalized ads from appearing in your browser. One-click shopping is especially dangerous. Make it even more difficult for you to buy online by deleting your credit card number from sites that have it linked to your account. Do this even if you are also blocking those sites too. This will create an added security; if you have found a way to rationalize being on the site, you will still have enough time to rethink your decision to make individual purchases.

Getting Outside Help

Enlist the support of friends and family. Secrecy is one of the major components of shopping addiction (and most addictions, for that matter). So, don’t be afraid to get public about your problems with shopping. Tell your friends and family what’s going on, and that you may ask them for help going shopping or buying necessities—at least in the early stages of cutting down when temptation is still very high. Make sure that you only open up to trusted loved ones who are capable of supporting you through your push to cut down on shopping.

Visit a therapist. A therapist can help you understand some of the possible problems that lay at the root of shopping addiction, such as depression. Although there is no standardized treatment for shopping addiction, you might expect to be prescribed antidepressants, like SSRIs. One commonly used method for treating addictions is a method called cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). This type of therapy will help you recognize and challenge some of your thoughts related to shopping. Therapy will also help you place less value on extrinsic motivating factors, like a desire to look successful and wealthy, and more value on intrinsic motivators, like feeling comfortable in your skin and maintaining nourishing relationships with loved ones.

Find a meeting. Group therapy for shopping addiction is an abundant and invaluable resource. Being able to share coping tips and feelings with others who have similar problems can sometimes be the difference between sobriety and relapse back into your old, unhealthy spending habits. Look into local chapters of Debtors Anonymous or Spenders Anonymous. These are 12-step programs that can help you manage your shopping addiction on an ongoing basis. Use this link to locate a Debtors Anonymous meeting near you.

Go to a credit counselor. If your shopping addiction has gotten you into serious financial trouble that you are unable to manage on your own, you may want to consider seeing a credit counselor. A credit counselor can help you deal with the massive debt that accrues as a result of shopping addiction. Dealing with the financial fallout of shopping addiction can be stressful alongside the emotional issues that arise with overcoming your habit. Because stress is a common trigger for relapse, a credit counselor might be an important resource.