Common Lies to Look Out For
Keep your eye out for the following lies that men tell in relationships. The following list was assembled by a group of male relationship experts for Cosmo magazine: Saying he's fine. Lots of men are too proud to admit it when anything is bothering them, while others lie in order to avoid drama at all costs. Either way, it might be a good idea to give him some time to cool off before asking again. Giving excuses for not answering his phone. If he tells you that his phone was either off, out of batteries, or that he didn't have service, it could be him covering up for screening your call. That doesn't necessarily mean he didn't want to talk to you, but lying is safer than telling the truth in his eyes. Lying about drinking. Men in relationships oftentimes downplay how much they drank, or plan on drinking, in a given night. That's mostly because they (rightfully) assume that the truth will be met with disapproval. Telling you he's stuck in traffic. Men certainly aren't alone on this one; men and women alike use this go-to lie to avoid having to explain why they are really running late. Calling his ex-girlfriend "crazy." Lots of men tell this lie because they are unwilling to accept responsibility for a breakup. It's also a classic cover-up for a guy who still secretly talks to his ex behind your back (i.e. "I don't know why she's texting me! She's CRAZY!")
Consider these telltale signs that he is only interested in sex. If you've been casually sleeping with a guy in the hopes that he'll one day become your boyfriend, beware of these red flags: He tells you that he's not ready for a relationship yet. What he really means is that he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you. As an extra slap in the face, he tacked on the word "yet" in order to keep you coming back for more. Believe us, the minute the right girl comes along, he'll be more than ready to hop on the monogamy bandwagon. He says he doesn't want to ruin the friendship. If that was the case, he wouldn't have slept with you in the first place. This is just a nice way of saying that he doesn't have any romantic feelings toward you. He insists on keeping your fling under wraps. When a man cares for a woman, he wants to show her off. If you've been sleeping with this guy for more than a couple months and haven't been introduced to any of his friends, it's probably because he's not looking for anything other than sex. It's also very possible that he's seeing other women, and is afraid of introducing these women to the same friend group. You should evaluate your relationship if your partner barely talks to you except when he wants sex. Does not ask you out on a date and always finds excuses for why he cannot hang out with you. Texts you late at night and asks you to come over. It is like a booty call and does not make you feel that you are someone special.
Be careful when it comes to online dating. The following are things that men often lie about on their dating profiles in order to attract more women: What they look like. Lots of men use outdated pictures of themselves to appear younger, or pictures that otherwise don't accurately represent what they really look like. To be fair, though, women are just as guilty of this dating faux pas. Their age. Because so many men seek to date younger women, they'll round down a couple (or several) years to open up a larger pool of potential matches. What they are really looking for. Whether it's his hobbies/interests or whether or not he wants to have a family, lots of men lie about what they are looking for because in reality, all they want is a fling. What they do for a living. This is perhaps the most deceitful thing a man can lie about on his dating profile, but it does happen. Again, the motive here is clear: to attract more women.
Improving the Level of Trust in Your Relationship
Be open with him. Trust is a two-way street. If you constantly keep things from him, then you can't expect him to always be totally honest with you. You need to open up to him and tell him what's on your mind if you want the same in return.
Show him that you are an understanding person. Lots of men lie about small, insignificant things simply because they don't want to cause drama. If you are the type of person who throws a tantrum anytime something doesn't go your way, you may want to consider working on how you react to things. Next time he does or says something that bothers you, try communicating how you feel in a calm, mature way rather than simply yelling at him and slamming the door.
Don't provoke him with unnecessary questions. When it comes to relationships, some conversations just don't need to happen. For example, asking him things like "Do you think she's pretty?" or "Do I look fat in this?" put him in a very uncomfortable position. In essence, you are asking him to either lie or come across as a total douche bag. Our advice? Ask a friend instead.
Respect his privacy. While it's true that relationships are built upon honesty and communication, everybody is entitled to keeping certain things to themselves. Remind yourself every once in a while that you don't really need to know every minuscule detail of his life.
Avoid Being Hurt in the Future
Don't stay with somebody who constantly lies to you. While this seems like a no-brainer, lots of women stay with men who treat them poorly in the hopes that they will one day change. But if you let him lie to you over and over again and get away with it, you are essentially teaching him that his behavior is okay. This is not to say that one or two white lies warrants a breakup. Everybody tells lies now and then, but use your best judgment to decide what is okay and what's not.
Trust your instincts. When you know somebody well enough, it's easy to tell (even without solid proof) when they are lying. If you find yourself feeling plagued with suspicions of lies or infidelity, put your worries to rest and find out for sure. Confront him straight out, ask a mutual friend, or hire a private investigator---whatever it takes. But find out now.
Choose men for the right reasons. Good looks, lots of money, and fame don't ensure that he'll treat you well. Go figure! If you perpetually find yourself dating guys who lie and cheat, you may want to reassess the qualities you look for in a significant other. Lots of women are attracted to the "bad boy" persona; deep down, part of them wants to be treated poorly. Luckily, this is a habit that you'll eventually outgrow (we hope).
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