What does wearing white to a funeral mean?
Wearing white to a funeral often symbolizes life and rebirth. While black is the standard color of mourning in Western cultures, other cultures and religions prefer to wear white to funerals as a way to celebrate the life of the person who passed. This is because white is often associated with life, rebirth, peace, and purity. It can also symbolize the soul’s journey to the afterlife. Hirst notes, “Cultural context matters. In many Eastern traditions, including Hindu, Buddhist, and some Chinese funerals, white is actually the traditional mourning color. In these cultures, white represents purity, rebirth, and spiritual peace.” White is also the traditional color of mourning for many Sikh and some Muslim services. Meet the wikiHow Expert Jules Hirst is an Etiquette Coach and founder of Etiquette Consulting, Inc. She empowers individuals in social skills, leadership, and confidence through the lens of etiquette.
Can you wear white to a funeral?
It depends on the culture and the ceremony. Hirst says, “In the United States and many Western cultures, black or dark colors are considered their traditional color of mourning. It's often seen as a symbol of respect and remembrance. Wearing all white to a funeral in these settings is generally not the norm, unless it's been requested by the family.” So, there’s a chance wearing white or bright colors could be considered disrespectful. However, views on this are changing, and many families now choose to wear light colors to celebrate the deceased’s life. If you aren’t sure about the family’s views, though, it’s probably best to wear muted, dark colors. Hirst notes, “A white blouse under a dark blazer or a subtle white accessory can be appropriate, especially if styled modestly and paired with dark tones.” In cultures where wearing white to a funeral is the norm, it’s often considered disrespectful to wear bright, flashy colors like red, which symbolize joy. In Taoist traditions, the family of the deceased often wear white, while the other guests typically wear dark colors. In Soka funerals, it’s generally acceptable to wear white if it’s modest and subdued, but attendees are encouraged to dress in muted colors.
Knowing What to Wear to a Funeral
Check the funeral invitation or obituary for dress code guidelines. If a family prefers that guests dress a certain way for a funeral, they may list the dress code guidelines in the funeral invitation or obituary. Following the dress code shows respect for the deceased and their family. If a dress code isn’t listed, ask a close friend or family member of the deceased. They can clarify any questions you have, especially if you’re attending a funeral in a culture other than your own. “If you're attending a service where cultural customs are different from your own, it's perfectly respectful to ask ahead of time if there's a dress preference. Because ultimately, funeral etiquette is about honoring the wishes of the family and showing up with thoughtfulness and grace,” Hirst says. If you have to ask someone, remember to approach the topic with sensitivity, as the family is grieving. Be kind and express your intentions clearly, stating that you want to honor the deceased and be respectful toward the family.
Follow the dress code as closely as possible. If you’re asked to wear white to a funeral, it may seem odd or disrespectful if you come from a culture where wearing black is the norm. Remember, though, that this is a way to pay your respects, so it’s best to follow the guidelines as closely as possible. In most cases, you probably won’t have to buy a whole new outfit. As long as you try your best, the family will likely understand that you’re being respectful.
Keep your attire simple. Unless otherwise specified, avoid wearing flashy colors or revealing ensembles to a funeral. Choose an outfit that is simple and conservative, as your clothes should communicate respect and solemnity, not distract from the service. For example, unless you’re specifically asked to wear all white, consider pairing a white shirt with a dark suit or skirt.
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